Are you a yeller?
As a parent, I don’t yell to get my point across. My neighbor used to ask me often if I could hear her yelling at her kids? I never did but it was an interesting question and it gave me a glimpse into their life, no judgment what-so-ever. I am uncertain if I would have ever been a ‘yeller’ because when Connor was very little, before and after his diagnosis with autism, whenever anyone raised their voice, he would scream. It was as if he was matching the energy, volume or velocity of the energy he was feeling from another. Even when my darling husband would get excited about a football play, Connor would match that excitement with a scream.
It was out of necessity I had to learn how to get my point across in a calm, neutral, centered way of being. I had to embody calm energy to command the attention of my children, rather than using loud verbiage to demand my children listen to me. From my ‘now’ perspective, it is as if when a parent yells, their children tune them out, sort of like being a radio station. When you turn up the volume and yell to get your point across which is a dominant feeling energy, our children put up their guard or a wall and all they can hear is static. When you take a moment to embody calm and become centered, you then have the ability to command their full attention. Play with it, it is so interesting to me because we are all becoming more aware of our ability to use our energy rather than demanding with loud language, some are more aware than others since we all learn at our own pace, which is perfect no matter where you are, but we are all evolving in this way. So much more can be and IS conveyed beyond words anyway.