Finding ‘their’ way
My husband and I have always done our best to parent our children in a way filled with love, ease and respect. We parent with the premise; if we want genuine, authentic respect, we must show our respect; if we desire a servant’s heart, we must set the example of a servant’s heart, offering by example our expectations of our children. Whatever it is we desire for our children to be or act, in a genuine, non-resistant manner, rather than being forceful, we offer the same actions, energy, vibration or mirror reflection. We have truly shifted for the most part from the old parental paradigm as generations before us parented, the stern, forceful, “Do as I say, not as I do”, “I’m the parent that’s why” mentality and we have done so with lovely results allowing our children freedom within a loving, safe environment.
This morning as I observed our children heading out the door, I heard our daughter in her ‘eldest’ sibling role, teasing her younger brother. For a moment I almost stepped in to ask her to stop, after all Connor may not be able to stick up for himself since he has limited language, she wasn’t being hurtful or mean, she was simply being her competitive by nature self, exerting her ‘mother hen’ role she has carried since our second child was born. I am so happy I restrained myself in that moment because just as I made my decision to allow the moment to unfold, Connor in his own way, gave it right back to her. I had to laugh, to which Alison responded, “Mom, don’t encourage him!” Because of my mindfulness of the moment to let them work it out, their own banter and the moments that followed offered such clarity to me.
How do we prepare our children for the world? If I step in as the ‘protector’ certainly it curtails the behavior in the moment but I will not be able to play the referee all of their lives. They must learn to navigate their way through life and without the ‘practice’ how can they ever be able to do that? This morning I am in such appreciation for having the awareness within, allowing them to find their own way is a powerful step towards their own personal well-being. These moments of learning help them to navigate their own awareness, their own energy, their own vibration, prepares them or lays the foundation for their own stability within the world, allowing them to find their own way in these incrimental moments/steps is the best way to prepare our children for a content, balanced life in their future.